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<h1>? ky T? </h1>
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<h3>Monday, July 23, 2007</h3>
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<h2>
? oken mold</h2>
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<div style="c? ? h;"></div>What does it mean to be wicked? /><br />A golem won? ? /><br />He works his mouth and still feels the ? of dry paper. H? allowed it long ago when he began to speak.<br /? />T? ed. Sorc? . A cand? ? ? tyle="fo? tyle? alic? zele? pan>. Hi? other in Prague, a life without stairs. But the ? t le? had bee? ased, so--what is life?<br /? />He moves with the? ? ome creak of? ed clay. The others ? ees--the? e clay, too,? ? hing? ? n they move.? hands are afire, his body a shadow.? s he? ses, and? ses again, a? ? ? and col? eeze are? footprints.<br /><br />? hinks of the Jin? ? eople of wind and flame.? ld he be an ifrit? Were ? wicked? He ? be,? ? ed imitation of ? e little ani? tha? eak,? tle,? ch, hug,? e in bright air and ? sha? ? /><br />Didn't the Jinn gra? ishes? Maybe he ? ld, too.<br /><br />Wishes. ? ? a little girl, sudd? ? the? end of a school playground. She is alon? itting on a swing. Absent-faced,? t in? tho? s. Nobody comes ? ? ? /><br /? ? tyle="fo? tyle? alic;">Hmm,<? he golem thinks. He watches.<br /><br />A be? ? somewhere. She ? he last student inside, speaking to no one. Soon, the yard is de? ed, and he c? lip insi? ? chool unobserved. Doors opening and ? ing ? ? own tend to, he's discovered, attract attention? /><br /? ide is all c? e linoleum a? teely blue-gray walls. He feels almost c? ? hobic, b? teels himself. The golem? ? er been in a school before, so does not feel luc? hat each doo? ? ? h a wide window, providing a cle? iew of each ? sroom and th? udents i? cerated ? ein.? tead, a dull? tain? hat ? is how schools are ? in his hollow head with? ? lar <spa? yle="fon? yle: italic;">thunk</span>.<br /? />He takes a good five ? tes at each window, scanning each face caref? and thoroughly, looking? the? l--<span? le="? ? le: italic;"? ? an> girl, he? ? ? beg? o think. He exam? one side of the hall first, then th? her. It ? ? e takes him ? ly an ho? o complete his c? it of the first floor. No sign of his girl. ? tand? ock-still for a moment, wondering if he has ? emembered her face, then sees a sign at the far end ? he hall ? to a formidable steel door ? ? ith ? sh-b"Stairs.? /><br />He trudges ? he end of the hall, makes certain no one is watching, an? ? the doo? en. ? ly, ? ily, he begi? o climb the concrete-and-iro? aircase. When he rea? the second floor, a sign on the steely-blue cinderblock wall po? up and ? ? ? , saying "Administration? hile below it, a? ? p sheet ? ? ? ? reads "Lowe? ? ," complete with? hick black a? pointing to the door on the left.<br /><br />He pulls i? en a? ees ? her hallway.? tuna? ? takes only three cl? ? before he f? ? ? /><br />Thi? hen, is ? e he waits.<br /? />Three? rs l? , the be? ? ? eating an ecg clango? and? n the hall and a? s the golem'? one skin. The vi? ion ? npleasant, b? he golem? ? this when a? eam of children begi? ouring out of each door and ? s into a gre? ? of shriekin? ? ing babb? hat barely c? up ? he golem? ? ? /><br /? t, finally, ? , his girl leaves. Sad a? ilen? read is ? , her shoulders bowed. He fo? s her do? ? ? s, down the hall? t the door, and ? the chain-link gate. She walks ? two blocks before e? ing a na? doo? in ? imy bric? ilding, and he follows. The ? ? ? case provides difficult climbing? the golem, ? e chest is a? oad as his girl ? all.<br /><br />She reaches the ? d floor, where a hal? lies, i? ? yellowed wi? ? and cig? ? moke. There are ? two doors, and she chooses the one ? he left. The gol? uick? ? in behind her, but has to hold the ? open long enough for him to? er. ? ? ely,? ? l th? the rug? ? ten caught ie doorjamb, and spen? ? ? econds a? ting? ? itio? recious seconds the gole? ? o slide into the apartme? ? iced? /><br />The apartment is fi? ? oken? liances and old ? papers e? ? e. It sm? of stale cigare? and, vaguely, of cat piss, ? ? he golem hears no meowing. The living room is the fo? orn-out old green couch positioned i? ont ? he TV, a fad? laid armchair ne? ? ? st i? ont ? he door. In it is a man,? , goatee? earing a gray sleeve? undershirt (it was once white), and? ers with such enormous h? that the golem ? ? know how his genitals are n? isible.<br /? />Though he? ? tle experien? ith normal living co? ? , the golem somehow,? ? ically, ? s th? his is not a good home. ? is not his girl? roper place. He ? the open can of beer in the man's left hand, poised over a pile of ? hed ? cans of sim? make, and k? this ma? ? in his right mind.<br /? />Still, he is ? rised wh? he m? right hand ? ? t an? abs hold of the girl? ? arm. Sh? ? in shock, a? o do? he golem? /><br />The man bel? , giving vent to? rodi? sly flammable vapor. "You're an ? ? e," ? ays,? speech not,? ? ? ite ? ell-defined as human speech ? ld be.<br /><br />The gi? nothing.<br /><br />"Well?" he asks. "Gonna be a smart-ass bitch? Too go? o ta? o your ol' d? ms?"<br /><br />She maintains her silence, looking away. The gol? enses th? he k? this will not e? ell, no ? ? hat she chooses to do. So she does nothing. It is going to happen an? ? /><br />"Smart-ass bitch, huh?" the man growls. He jerks her cl? to him and grin? howi? ? al gaps. "Not a fucking sound. That's gonna chan? ? ? ? ? ? ." With ? ick, con? ive move? , he pul? he l? that cl? ? recline? ? the? l in front of him, a? ? s her on the? ch. Stil? ? ays nothing.<br /><br />? ? ? over an? lls down? ? ? ? s.<br /><br />The golem has had ? gh. He g? the man? houl? ? lls him off ? he girl, gri? he m? ? er jaw, the man's flesh ? ling in the golem's burning ? , an? pan style="font-style: italic;">? ts</span>. A dull snap is heard, and then nothing.<br /><br e golem ? the body fall.<br /? />His girl still does n? peak. Sh? ? at the ? se, her ? ? en, stunned. She waits. When no motion is forthcoming, a? ? ealizes ? he is no lo? breathing, she ging? climbs off ? he couch, and pokes his arm with the toe of her shoe. Nothing.<br />/>She pokes him harder. Nothing. Still harder, and a? ? nd flash? ? ? he gloom? artment. Startle? he golem realizes th? his new soun? ? ob. His girl kee? oking the lifeless <span? le="? ? le: italic;">thing</span> on the floor--and here, the golem begi? o wo? what the di? ence? ween himself and the mea? ing at his feet really is--harder, and harde? ntil she is no longer poking? kicking. Vi? sly her tenn? hoe stabs the cooling flesh as h? eeping becomes louder and more--somehow-? ltant.<br /><br />Wh? he girl finally ? ? inding down like a broken toy, her father's face is ? ined? lpy ? , and his body is covered in? ? . Sh? once again silent, except for a? tain? ch in he? eath. She sits back down on the couch, a? uddenly, she thinks ? ? hing? /><br /? someone there?" she calls out. It is the first time the golem h? ? voice.<br /? />He coers for a mo? . Finally, he sa? ? ly, "I am here."<br /><br />"Where? I can't see you.? are? ? e?"<br /? />"I am a golem," he says b? ly. ? hing of ? . You ca? see me because I do? want to be seen. I am here because..." His voice fades. He ? ? kno? reci? , why he is here? /><br />"Be? e why?" Her voic? plaintive.<br /? />I? as good an ? er as any. "Because you needed me."<br /? />She i? iet for a mo? . Th? he asks, "Can I see you?? /><br />"No."<br /><br />She does n? ay anything. Fin? , the golem ? , "Y? hould ca? ? olice. Tell them? ? ? ed a man in here? ting? r fa? . He? ld not bring himself to ? a child, so fled."<br /? />She nods,? ing nothing.<br /><br />"I am going to go," ? ays hesi? ly. ? will not see me again." Something in him makes him ? e, a? hen say, "Ma? he most ? his.? /><br />She nods si? ly again? /><br />He ? ? artment, leaving the? l nothin? t a warm breeze and a do? hat opens and cl? by itself.<br /? />He le? the building, j? the crowd o? ? ? hing? ? ? t the doorway, a? ealizes ? he has ? killed ? man. He has ? ? ? tyle="fo? tyle? alic;">ended? an>. The end of a golem comes about by either one of two means. ? t, in smithereen? econd, b? asing a single letter on? iece of paper.<br /><br ? that ea? than snuffi? ? apient flame? He thinks it i? ch easier to erase a hum? han a golem. Does that make him a wicked cre? e?<br /><br />What does it mean to be wicked? /><br /olem won? .<di? yle="clear:both; padding? tom:0.25em"></div><br />
<div ? s="bylin? oste? Hugh Va? ? z &? ;# <? ef="? ? nark? mor.usb-abacus.com/2007/07/broken-mo? hp" titl? erma? link">9:42 AM</a> <a href=? ps:/? .blo? .com/com? .g?blogID=5131062399532573109&postID3257868149834820"locatio? ef=h? ? ww.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=5131062399532573109&? ID=3433257868149834820;><spa? yle=? ? ansform:lowe? e">0 Com? ? pan></a>? pan ? s="item-? rol blog-adm? id-1556466247"><? yle=? der:none;" href=? p://www.blogger.com/? -edit.g?blogID=51310623995325731? ostID=343325786814983482? itle="Edit Post"><img class="icon-action" alt="" src? tp:/? .blo? .com:80/img/icon18_edit_allbkg.gif" height="18" ? h="18"></a></span> <? >
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<h3>Thursday, ? 19, 2007</h3>
<a name="3338895485503932033">? p;</ <h2>
? pati? ? ? ? </h2>
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<d? tyle="clear:both;"><? ? ? ? ing Pasi?